: Diary :

+ 2008 + 2551 +

‘I felt so left out, not understanding what they were talking about’ / 26 January 2008

At the first meeting party that I met my husband friends, I was so excited. When I came there, I just said ‘hello’ and smiled to them and then I was quiet. We sat around the table and then my husband started to tell them about me in English. They looked at me and smiled. I smiled back and was still quiet. And then they asked me questions. I answered them but many times they could not understand what I said. My husband explained to them about that again. I started to be ashamed of my English.

‘Oh! My Buddha, I studied a lot of English but why can’t I speak well enough!?!? ’, I thought.

I had to wrong pronunciation in many words and strange sentences. Then they got bored to talk with me and changed the topic to talk about.

‘Yes, it is ok. I know and I don’t want to talk more also’, I thought.

One of them got tired to speak English and started to speak Swedish instead. Then all of them turn to speak bla bla bla… The guy turned to me and said ‘Oh! Sorry that we speak Swedish.’

I just sat quiet there and held my husband’s hand while the others were talking and laughing.

Yui